Taking the piss

Yep. Finally breaking my stony silence. Not that I haven’t had many, many reasons to write in the last one and a half months. But what happened early this morning is just too hilarious to let fade and not document forever on this here public blog o’ mine.

So I’m always deathly thirsty just before bed for some reason, and 12 midnight yesterday was no exception. I gulped down a glass of water and went to bed shortly after. Sometime later I found myself with the urge to pee. I came across a chair, sat on it…and proceeded to pee in full view of…everyone passing by. I actually did not care. I just…let go. And boy did it feel good.

If you couldn’t tell by now, that was a dream. Seconds into letting it allllll go, I woke up. And immediately felt wet down there. My eyes widened. I gasped.

I had, indeed, urinated for real.

And no, it wasn’t mere droplets. It was a proper pee-fest. Which I was somehow able to stop midway while I nervously patted around the area to check if I had wet the bed. Miraculously, I hadn’t! It had not soaked through my bed sheet yet or even my shorts for that matter. I gingerly got out of bed, headed to the bathroom, finished the deed, washed up, got changed, and went back to bed, mortified and laughing at myself.

I’ve had ‘need to pee’ dreams and woken up needing to pee countless times, but I’ve never ever actually done it in bed. Wow.

So yeah. My first update of 2014 is about how I almost wet the bed.

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